CFNM meaning: No matter how many times he assures you that she is just his best friend– there is something about her presence in your man’s life that makes your heart ache with jealousy. Why does he have a need to talk to her, text her, hang out with her? Now that you are in a committed relationship with him — why does your man need to remain in communication with another woman who makes him laugh and whom his family loves? If they were not “just friends” they would make a such a cute couple and this is what bothers you the most.
Now that you are his girlfriend does he really need to a “female best friend?” What could his female best friend possibly give him that you can’t? Does he trust and love her more than you? Is she a threat to your relationship? Does she secretly have a crush on your man? Is she waiting in the wings to take your place? Who has the most power over your man-you or his female best friend? Well there are advantages to both relationships depending on how he truly feels about his female best friend–FBF.
The advantage of being his wife or girlfriend is that you get to make love to him, kiss him, see his nude body, go to family functions, attend work-related events, spend holidays together, set relationship boundaries such as expecting him to call or come home at certain times of the day.
His FBF may never get to know him in the intimate way that you do. She may never know the taste of his kisses, or the way he whispers, “I love you” after having an orgasm; but her position of power in his life is a lot deeper than a sexual relationship. Her relationship with your man is not as intense, potent and rich with passion but this is exactly what gives her the upper hand in your man’s life because she is not having arguments with him fueled by jealousy over who called, or fights over who left the toilet seat up, drank the last of the milk without replacing it, splitting the bills, sharing the remote, or in-law drama.
So what does his female best friend have to offer him that you can’t? — The most honest and truest part of his heart and soul. Yes, your man tells his FBF all the things that he could never, ever, tell you in a million years because it would break your heart. His FBF is privy to how he really feels about your body-whether he really thinks you need to lose weight; she knows his truest intentions for your relationship and all of the other women that he is attracted to.
An advantage of being the FBF is that he will typically ask her “the female perspective” on important issues such as love including whether or not he should break up with you, marry you or apologize about the last argument you had in your relationship. Her ultimate power is that she was a part of his life before you came and will likely be a part of his life if or when you leave.
As long as his FBF does not have sex with him – she will always hold a powerful, meaningful position in his life. Sex complicates relationships because it is an emotional chemical that either bonds or destroys a couple based on other variables in the relationship. If he is not having sex with his FBF this gives him the emotional freedom to share with her the details about his sex life that he wouldn’t even be comfortable discussing with a male friend.